P.O.A.SNAPPLE & REFLECT!

Hey kids! Well this is a very special edition of Pop Open A Snapple And Reflect! This occurred at around 9:00pm and what you are about to read is almost exactly what I told him. enjoy!

To the older gentleman sharing a hospital room with me. I understand that English is not a language that you understand and use often so I went to the nurses' station and found one that can speak Spanish to translate what I'm about to say to you.
1. After the nurse specifically told you to not move you decided to not listen and fell onto the hard floor.  Who got you help?
2.I understand that you are pretty much deaf.  Who didn't ask you to turn off your TV , but instead offered you headphones?
3. Since I'm by the window and you are by the bathroom, who would wait till morning to use the bathroom so that I wouldn't have to to turn on the lights at night to disturb you.
4.who doesn't complain when you keep your TV  on and blasting ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT LONG,calls nurses for you when your IV beeps so the alarm doesn't keep going off
The list goes on and on.
The reason I went to the nurses station and found a nurse that speaks Spanish is because I want to make sure you understand every damn word that comes out of my mouth!    I'm the one that does and did all those tings for you, because I was raised to be respectful of my neighbors and my elders.  I didn't know what you were here for and I was trying tot be polite.  But, apparently you don't care.   You need to pop open a Snapple, sit in a corner, and reflect on the fact that you are getting ripped a new asshole in English and Spanish right now while in the hospital because you are a disrespectful, rude,old bastard who doesn't know how to speak to people and thinks people have to be nicer to you because you're old and that you'll get a away with your rude comments and behavior because you claim you don't understand English and what is going on.  But, you seemed to know what was going on when you decided to yell at my visitors and myself earlier and amazingly it was in English.   Wow, a miracle!   When my guest were here you were gone and we didn't know you had returned.  If we were too loud all you had to do was make you return known and we would've quieted down or even gone to the lounge.  You would rather scream and yell and make a scene. Making my guest uncomfortable.  Now you have a very angry guy educating you while you are crapping your hospital gown.  I once had a great shrink named Dr. Weiss and he told me that the happiest people you'll ever meet are assholes. They don't care about anyone else just themselves and are blind to what is being done for them and feel entitled to treat people any which way.  While being kind to you the only thing that was happening was making me uncomfortable and I was the one going without.  Well you sir are an asshole and you better learn to think twice before you decide to disrespect my friends or myself.  I'm not having a good time here and my give a damn is very thin.  If you show your ass like that again I will make sure that the rest of your time in this hospital will not be a pleasant one.  I will do my best to make sure that you are as uncomfortable as you have been making me. 
   I'm sorry I had to embarrass you this way, but I went got a translator so that there would be no chance of miscommunication.  So sit there and reflect and hopefully when your hospital stay is over you feel a bit better and also leave a better person.
You don't need to say anything because you said plenty earlier.  
So Sip!

You need to sit in a corner, pop open a Snapple and REFLECT!

     Hey kids. I know I've been a little m.i.a as of late and I apologize! Things have been a little crazy but I think it's all finally settling down a bit.  I've only got a bit of time today so I'm going to introduce a new segment to the blog.  It's called "You need to sit in a corner and pop open a Snapple and reflect!" 

    If any of you have or get to spend any time with me you very well may have heard me end a rant with that statement.  So it's YOUR chance to email me a brief description of your problem, be it a person, a place, or thing, and I will kindly discuss the situation, as only TheBowtiedOne, can just for you. It will get posted on the blog and on my twitter. I will keep your names private cause I don't you getting your ass kicked, nor do I feel like getting mine kicked!  So don't be afraid send in whatever pissed you off that day or moment and let me handle it! If you can get a picture of the problem EVEN BETTER!  Screaming child during the middle of a movie, rudeness, snotty salespeople, the police, your boss, cable company, ugly person talking about the way you look. you get the point.

Here is today's.

To the lovely flower that decided that she would go about her business on one of the hottest days in NYC, dressed like she was 16 years old and wears a size 3, sitting on the "A" train. You need to sit in a corner, pop open a Snapple, and reflect on the fact that you aren't 16 and a size 3, you are about 53 and size XXL.  Somewhere in your mind you feel it is acceptable to leave your house wearing shorts so short that not only I, but quite a few passengers could see your change purse due to the fact that you could not close your legs. I understand that it was a hot day,but a nice decent pair of adult shorts would do.  You also stink.   How dare you vocally comment on how the train smells. News flash! It is you. The only way I can describe the unholy stench that was coming from your body was to imagine that Satan had some bad sushi, and from that a little smelly midget was born, it crawled into one of your orifices and died, came back to life, farted, then died again, and is still rotting somewhere on you. A sprinkle a day DOES keep odor away.  The only kind thing I can say to you is that your wig looked good. Maybe you should spend less money on your lace front and more money on clothes that fit and soap. Don't be mad. This isn't an attack. I just want you to sit in a corner, pop open an nice refreshing Snapple, and reflect on what i have just said to you.

 Also, I've been super busy getting ready for my first fall fashion edition.   this will be in two parts for guys and gals!  I'm so excited about this because it will have how to videos and everything.  Granted it may be made via video phone, but it will be fun!  If you want to be a part email me. The fashion edition will have my must have picks, tips, shopping hints, and advice.  Trust me times are hard so I'm going to this about looking your best while still being  able to afford to eat!

   You can also be apart of my world by sending in your pictures and saying,"help" I will choose a picture and will do talk about whats working for ya and what's not.  Don't be shy.  Let me be your G.B.F that goes shopping with ya and tell you the truth! Need make up tips, not sure about a outfit, wondering people give you strange looks when you walk out of the door? Let me be the one to give it to you straight.

There is more in the works so follow, comment, subscribe, and share. 

Thanks Y'all

-Q